I like my neighbour, but last night I was sorely tempted to sneak into his shed and pour sugar in the engine of his leaf blower.
It’s not just that he has a leaf blower that he uses as the sun sinks down and the day should be at its most peaceful. It’s that he has a leaf blower that comes complete with extra decibels and an intensely annoying high whine that drills into your head from its vantage point high above the bag-pipe drone of the lower engine note.
I don’t know where Dave managed to find it, but there’s a medieval Scotsman somewhere who wishes he could charge into battle with this thing strapped to his arm.